Guilt

Why do moms feel so much guilt? Today, I had an 18 month check up with my youngest daughter. The doctor was asking me how many words we are saying. And I'm thinking well, mama, dada, thank you and the rest I am not so sure of. And she looked at me perplexed that I didn't have the exact count. I asked how many words she should be articulating and it's 10-20 words. I instantly think we have to hurry home and start doing the word books! 

So then mom guilt and failure infiltrates. Another question I got; does she know her body parts? I'm like this is part of the wellness check at 18 months! I instantly think, we have to add working on body parts to the list. 

Then, she asked if we did swim lessons yet. And I know the importance of water safety, I am a big advocate of it, but I haven't found a replacement yet for our prior swim instructor. And I was reminded on how important that is to do.

Then, they ask how she is eating. and I think well, we lived off mac & cheese for x number of days in a row when I was solo parenting. But yes, she does eat well. 

I left there not feeling like the super mom of the year. But then, I took a step back and reminded myself how much I juggle in a day. Making an 8 am morning meeting daily for my FT job, after getting 2 kids out of the house- dressed with lunches and snacks, working today simultaneously as I took care of daughter half the day (no childcare for her). Thankfully dad took her for a few hours in the AM, that is when the heaviest part of my day is. 

Time is our most valuable asset and I hate when I waste seconds feeling guilty or inferior. We all do our best each day and that looks different on each individual parent. Some days I am on top of my game and other days, I am counting down to bedtime because I am exhausted myself. 

So, note to self, stop wasting time feeling guilty and less than. My daughter is only 18 months, we will learn swim safety, body parts and 100 words in due time! And we might be having mac & cheese as a side dish AGAIN!